Henry James

Hey everyone. I just wanted to check in and let everyone know that we are doing okay---not any better than that really. We had Henry's memorial service yesterday, and while beautiful, it was also heart-wrenching!! I am posting a poem that I found online last night that took my breath away it was so beautiful....
Since heaven has become your home
I sometimes feel that I'm alone;
And though we now are far apart
You hold a big piece of my heart
I never knew how much I'd grieve
When it was time for you to leave
Or just how much my heart would ache
From that one fragment you would take
God let this tiny hole remain,
Reminding me we'd meet again
And one day all the pain will cease
When He restores this missing piece
For Jesus heals each tiny part
That holds your memory in my heart

We have received numerous plants and things that will bloom forever if my black thumb doesn't take over. 2 of our neighbors bought us an azalea bush in henry's honor, and our dear friends Eric and Kendra sent us a beautiful rose bush as well. My aunt will be buying us whatever we wish in his honor as well, and I think I want a white Natchez Crepe myrtle. They bloom full and beautiful and have a wonderful sweet smell to them. I have also found a beautiful garden monument to put in that garden that is a baby laying on angel's wings. It will be Henry's memorial garden! I just hope I don't kill everything in it---I'm not the best at growing plants, etc.

I want to take a second to thank everyone for the care, thought, prayers and food everyone has provided to us. We really feel as though we have been lifted up and taken care of in the last week. I am on the ment physically---just not mentally yet.

I want to wish every single person a wonderful Christmas holiday with family, and a happy new year!!

KRista

Arrangements

I will be sending out an e-mail shortly, however, we will be having a memorial service for Henry at 1:00 on Saturday at our church, Fuquay Varina UMC. That's really all I know for now....I'll keep everyone posted as time goes on.

Krista

The saddest day of my life...

I believe that by now, most everyone knows what has happened in the last 60 hours or so, but just in case you haven't.

I went to the doctor on Thursday morning because I was having contractions, and the doctor thought I had a UTI and my uterus was irritated, and thus contracting. Well, the doctor used the doppler to try to find the baby's heartbeat, and was unsuccessful. We then had an external ultrasound, still no heartbeat....so we had an internal ultrasound, still nothing. The doctor sent me to see a perinatologist who had a better ultrasound machine, but they couldn't get me in until 3:00, about 4 hours later. We got there, and after both an external and internal ultrasound, still no heartbeat, our baby was gone.

My water broke at about 6:00 Thursday night, and I was then admitted to Duke University Medical Center at 9:00 on thursday. I delivered our son, Henry James, at 6:18 on Friday morning, December 14. Sadly, yesterday was also Barney's birthday. He has said that each year from now on, he will have an extra candle on his cake for Henry. We are going to have Henry cremated, so that we can keep him with us, and somedy, when something happens to me, he will be buried with his mommy. I'm still going to finish his stocking, and we will hang it each year as well. We did decide to go ahead and have an autopsy done, as well as chromosomal and genetic abnormalities. I'm not all that sure how long this will all take, but I am sure that it won't take nearly as long as it will for me to accept and deal witht his.

We will be having a service for Henry next Friday evening or Saturday. Right now that all depends on Church availability and the schedule of the minister who will be doing the service. I also want to say that every person we encountered while at Duke couldn't have been any better. The doctors and nurses who took care of me truly were Angels on earth.

Please continue to keep Barney and I in your prayers.