Anyone for a round of the "Hallelujah Chorus"?

Friday, May 2 will be my last day at my job.

I was never so happy to go to work as on this past Tuesday with a letter of resignation in my hands. My supervisor about dropped her teeth when she found it on her desk. After 8 1/2 years at Blue Cross, it was time to go.

During a meeting on Monday, my supervisor was discussing with me the fact that my work had been below the standard I set for myself for quite some time. She was right, it hasn't, but I have remained depressed, anxious and distracted by the events that happened in December. I tried to explain this to her, as well as telling her all the steps that I am taking to make it better. At that point, she very calmly looked at me and said, "what happened to you in december is no excuse for your sub-par performance". It took every ounce of self-control I could muster to not reach across the table and rip her face off. After much discussion and research about the options, we decided that as of May 2, I will stay at home with my kids.

I am still actively applying for teaching jobs, and last I checked there are a record number, 5 music jobs available in Wake county right now. The Wake County teacher job fair is on Saturday and I will be there, at 6 a.m. with bells on. Last year I got there at about 6:45 and was number 135 or so in line. I will be there at 6. Anyone that gets there earlier than that deserves to be ahead of me.

Thank God!

This is a bit off topic from what I usually type about, and a bit more intense, but this is HUGE for me. Those of you who have known me for a long time, will know how big this was when it happened. As a sophomore in high school, one of my cheerleading buddies and classmates, Jessica Keen was murdered. She was found naked, but for 1 sock, beaten to death and raped, in a cemetery near her home. Her body was found on March 17, 1991. It was the most surreal moment of my life until finding out about Henry's death. I can't even being to say how many people were afraid to even go to school out of fear that her killer went to school with us. Until this week, this murder had gone unsolved.

Weird though it may be, the man who raped and killed my high school friend transferred his parole (for other rapes) to NC and was working in a Walmart an hour away from here. He has now been arrested in NC and is awaiting extradition to Ohio. I'm still in shock, but so very glad for her family.

Jessica had the voice of an Angel, and more talent than any other person I had met at the time. I have very vivid memories of her playing tom sawyer in our middle school play, and it came so naturally to her. Please pray for her family as well as anyone else who has been effected by her death. Please continue to thank God for the law enforcement officers who have never let this case get too cold. Their time, effort and perserverence will hopefully give Jessica's family closure after 17 years.

Here is a link to one of the recent stories:
http://www.dispatch.com/live/content/local_news/stories/2008/04/09/jessica.html?sid=101

I have some pictures of myself and Jessica together, that I will post when I can.

Family Portrait

Hey everyone--I know a lot of you have access to Kara's blog as well, so you may have already seen this, but we got together, the whole entire family on my mom's side, to take a picture for my Nana's 80th birthday. It is really kind of funny because we only got 1 shot because it was pouring down rain---and here it is:

Funny Justin Story--I bought him a book at a book fair a little while ago called "Jesus and the 12 dudes who did". This is one of his favorite bedtime stories. This book talks about a number of the bible stories, including Jesus walking on the water. Saturday morning, before the picture above was taken, Mom and Dad were giving the kids a bath. Justin was holding on to the shower door handle and jumping up and down. Mom insisted that he stop before he fell down and hurt himself very badly. He looked at her very seriously and said, "Grammie, I'm walking on the water."

Also--please pray for the Lawrenson family. its really a very long story that I can't summarize here, but check out www.cfhusband.blogspot.com She is still in the hospital, but her lungs may be on the way. Their story is amazing and their faith inspires me. Take a look when you get a chance.

Have a good one.

Krista

Henry

Well--I have been thinking a lot about Henry these last few days. There is a group of girls I chat online with who all lost babies due in May--some very early, and 1 other girl had a late loss like mine. I went to check in on them today and one of the girls has a link posted to a video clip that was on the Today show today...I am always at work--but this touched my heart for obvious reasons and thought I would post the link here:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/23481435#23481435

I wish I had known about this group on December 13, because I most definitely would have called them. Here is the link to their website for additional information:

http://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/start.php

Enough said for the evening....Be well

In Memory of Henry

I know that most of you are here in NC and already know these things, but I wanted to share with the folks who live elsewhere. Barney has done a few things for me, and I for myself, in honor of Henry.

First--We have his urn, as well as the candle from the memorial service flowers. My sister, Kara also gave me a small porcelain figurine of a man and woman kneeling in prayer. The director of Justin's pre-school gave me a "Willow Tree" figurine that is called the Angel of Healing, and unkowingly, I had ordered an angel tealight holder. We have placed all of these things on one of the shelves in our living room. I will take a picture in the near future to post here as well.

Also, Barney bought me a blue topaz and diamond ring to wear with my wedding band each day. Henry's Birthstone, and thus Barney's too, is Blue topaz.

Finally--I chose to get a tattoo on my ankle in memory of our little angel. Some of you may remember that I posted a poem back in January that really touched me. Based on that poem I designed a tattoo that is a heart, with a tear-drop shape missing out of it and the heart has angel's wings. I am posting links to both.

Krista
http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d43/kristasjb03/weddingrings.jpg
http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d43/kristasjb03/tattooforhenry.jpg

other stuff that has made me laugh

I have been struggling with things to blog about--and Mom reminded me the other day that I had never posted this story which still cracks me up. Most of you know that I have a tattoo across my lower back, which my father affectionately calls my "wallpaper". I often forget its there because I can't see it in the mirror....well, last spring at some point, Justin asked my aunt about what was written on the butt of his cabbage patch doll..she responded that it was the baby's name. She then asked Justin if he had his name written on his butt and he very matter-of-factly responded, "no, but my mommy does."

Well--I'm hoping tha tmy annual bonus will afford me the opportunity to have the wall paper removed from my back. I never had it colored because I didn't like how it turned out and I've been trying to figure out how to have it fixed. When I got my tattoo in honor of henry, the tattoo artist informed me that there was a great place for tattoo removal in charlotte. I am looking forward to a road trip to Charlotte to have my "name" removed.

Silly Kid Things that Make me laugh

My kids have reached the stages where they do the most adorably funny things that make mommies like me laugh and enjoy them all the more. OF late there have been a lot of these instances. Sometimes I wonder if anyone else will be amused by these things, but then, Barney told me I HAD to post about these.

Ada Grace--Well, She is learning to talk more and more every day. She has learned to say "burp". When she does so and I ask her to say excuse me, she keeps saying "burp" over and over again. She has also started to figre out where her nose, hair, eyes and ears are. When we ask her where her eyes are she squints and blinks at us. If you ask her where her ears are she'll point to her hair because her daddy always says "ding, ding" when he tugs on her ears. So, if you ask her where her ding, dings are, she'll pull on her ears and say "ning, ning". Finally, if you ask her where her belly button is, she will pull up her shirt, stick her finger in her belly button and say "beep, beep". How did she possibly get so big so quickly?!

Justin--We were on the way home from Donna's last night and Justin was having some gas issues. He was being very careful to say "Excuse me" each time that he passed gas and of couse, I re-inforced this behavior at every opportunity. That is when things got funny. Justin had one of those moments where you have a number of small poots that he needed to let go, as in, like 10, rapid fire, machine gun style gas. Things then turned to this "scuse me, scuse me, scuse me, scuse me, scuse me, scuse me, scuse me. Mommy, I had to say scuse me again and again." It took all I had not to burst out in laughter at him. Not becuase it wasn't funny, but because he is the child that laughter is like putting a scratch across a record and asking it to skip for weeks. Laughter re-inforces his behaviors so he repeats them over and over again!